WHERE ARE YOU?

I was watching the news while having my breakfast this morning, and I came across a report on a fascinating gadget. It looks very much like a wristwatch, and it has all the features of a digital one, but it also contains a tiny GPS receptor inside which allows its position - and that of whoever is wearing it - to be tracked in real time. An additional feature prevents removal unless you have the required electronic key. But the most interesting detail is that the gadget is not meant to be worn by convicts, or cattle, but by children!

The chief executive of the company that manufactures the devices said, apparently without a trace of irony, that they were meant to "give children their freedom and parents peace of mind". Did I hear "Big Brother" and "doublethink"?

Not only does that device curtail children's freedom, but they will probably see it as a challenge. If you tell a feisty, but otherwise well-behaved child that he is punished and has to stay in his room, chances are that he will do it, albeit begrudgingly. If you lock him up, he will probably jump out of the window. Besides, a resourceful kid will find a way to get rid of the bracelet, and attach it to a nearby pigeon. Should make for some interesting location readings (it's apparently accurate to about 10m).

As for peace of mind, please let's not fool ourselves! If you are the type of person who feels the need to be informed of your child's location every moment of the day, you will never know peace of mind. Even if you manage to control your child, you'll be suspecting your employees, your lover, your accountant...

So, a word to the wise. If your somewhat jealous lover just offered you for Christmas a rather gaudy digital watch, you'd better be on your best behaviour. Or find a good locksmith.